May Already?!
Aight... April nominations.
Aight... April nominations.
What d'ya think?
Dickhead Rappers
Deeby was chilin at
Chris' when he's Wii U decided to fuck up and forced them to go
outside and reap the benefits of that sunny "Beer in the Park" kinda
day.
Living in and around
Brick Lane has it's perks. Decent curry to start the night, booze up
in a bar and hot girls every day. But like Deeby always says... “Fuck
Brick Lane on a weekend.”
 |
| "This beard is different 'cos it's mine." |
“Original” Bearded
hipsters swarm, bare tourists make it impossible to walk through the
place and there's always some Dickhead with a stack of CD's tryna
sell a mixtape. Heart warming smile from ear to ear, open and
welcoming body language, no facial hair... Manipulative prick.
“Ay! Yo! Brudda...!”
It's awkward, Deeby and
Chris have managed to walk past this guy.
“Brudda!” He shouts
from 6 yards behind us.
That swarm of bearded guys and tourists make it impossible to walk any further.
That swarm of bearded guys and tourists make it impossible to walk any further.
The kind rapper pats
Chris for his attention. “Shit.” he mutters.
“Brudda! How you
gonna walk away from a Brudda like that?” he guilt trips...
“Why does he keep
saying Brudda?” Deeby thinks to himself.
“You guys like Rap?”
“Here come's the pitch.” Deeby retorts.
“You a rapper?” Trying hard not to be a dickhead, Chris sounds like a top class Dickhead.
“You guys like Rap?”
“Here come's the pitch.” Deeby retorts.
“You a rapper?” Trying hard not to be a dickhead, Chris sounds like a top class Dickhead.
“How could you tell?”
he says with a wit and charm.
“Everyone's a rapper.
WE'RE bloody rappers...” Cool it, Deeby.
“Alright sweet. Lets drop some bars. Here. Now.”
“Only if you're any good.” Chris haggles.
“Alright sweet. Lets drop some bars. Here. Now.”
“Only if you're any good.” Chris haggles.
“Deal.”
He drops some of the
dopest bars you'll ever hear from a mixtape pusher on the
street.
“Now it's your turn...”
You know that moment when someone does what you do so much better than you do and you immediately lose all confidence and question why you ever started doing what you do?
“Now it's your turn...”
You know that moment when someone does what you do so much better than you do and you immediately lose all confidence and question why you ever started doing what you do?
Well, that sorta
happened to Deeby and Chris just then. They started spitting. They
forgot they bars. They tried free styling. They flopped. Rap Crime
#1. They performed it.
Treats 'em right for
being such dickheads... Nominated.
Zero Progress Dickhead
You know what?
I think I'll tell you bout this nomination in the form of a Dickhead Poem.
Show Chris and Deeby up...
 |
| On the left there... that's Rich. |
So there's this girl.
She's kinda hot.
And there's this
dickhead, who's kinda not.
And this dickhead had
made a bet.
Chris reckons he's
already in debt.
10 Grand he would have
to miss.
If this girl, the
Dickhead could not kiss.
2 Years is plenty of
time
That kiss would feel
sublime
And after the bet was
clearly stated
A Year flew by. The
Dickhead looked slick
When Chris facebook
raped him and liked all her profile pics.
This game was
hilarious. Nothing like chess.
And funnier to know
that he'd made Zero Progress.
Unless he pulls out the
candle lit dinner and champagne
It looks like Rich
might just get nominated again.
Zero Progress?!
Dickhead. Nominated.
Who d'you think wins this month?
Dickhead Out
